I am an avid driver. I know I know. It’s TERRIBLE for the environment but fantastic for my mental health. Something about being able to operate a 2-ton death machine makes me feel a little bit more in control of my life.
Now some of you are scuffing and rolling your eyes and wondering why I don’t just go for a walk. Well, I’m Black. And I like to clear my head at night.
Check yo privilege Susan. Back off Becky.
It was on one of these drives that I had this thought.
When we are children, we learn absolutes. We are taught the extremes of life and are told whether they are good or bad. The blacks and whites of society if you will. We are told that violence is bad and kindness is good.
As we grew older, we began to understand that life is not absolutes—it’s full of grey areas. I argue that life is just learning to negotiate the grey areas that exist in our society. Now, it’s a tough pill to swallow but bear with me for a second...OK?
For example, we are taught that lying is bad as children. As we grow older, we negotiate lying in different capacities. We lie to friends and family to save them from unintentional pain. And on the same sentiment, we lie to protect people from harm. What happens when someone lies to protect a victim of abuse? Society applauded this person for protecting another, and does not condemn them for violating the absolute.
However society—just like relationships—has non-negotiable principles. Murder, for instance, is ALWAYS wrong and will be punished by law. But what happens when these non-negotiables have unmentioned asterisks? Are these the same as the grey areas mentioned above?
No. They are not the same. A grey area is an unforeseen circumstance that seems to violate a principle. However, society works together to see if this temporary solution was a wise decision. Asterisks are embedded in size 8 font in a size 20 contract. They were established from the beginning and their existence is known by a select few. But it’s impact is felt by the masses.
Murder is illegal in all 50 states including US territories. It is a human absolute that is agreed upon GLOBALLY. And yet, Breonna Taylor’s murders are still at large.
What happens when a group of people feel like the asterisks to society’s non-negotiables?
Murder is illegal*
*Except when you kill a Black person.
All lives matter*
*Except Black lives.
Peaceful protests are encouraged in civil discourse*
*Except it’s automatically violent when Black people participate.
Society is on a positive linear trend of change*
*Except on issues pertaining to Black people.
Do you catch my drift? For 400 years, Black people have been fighting for the same basic privileges reserved for some in our society. We have been put in the margins. We have experienced being told and denied rights, labeled as the asterisks of society. We are reduced to a hashtag and a slogan of mock peace. WE ONLY MATTER WHEN OUR VOTES ARE NEEDED. And if we don’t agree, they find a way to take it away from us.
I’m tired of making others feel comfortable.
I’m tired of begging people to see that my Black life matters.
I’m tired of being reduced to a hashtag.
I’m tired.
So I’m just going to be my finest, Blackity-Black Black self. I’m going to play NWA’s F*ck the Police on the loudest setting and I’m going to fight. Fight for my rights the best way I know how: by being my most authentic self. My self care is a protest.
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