Edited by Corona Zhang
When people say “I don’t see color,” it usually comes from a good place. They think that not seeing color equals “I am not racist”.
However, this statement is actually quite problematic.
First of all, this train of thought is faulty. We all see color. Second of all, it's totally fine to see color. Skin color is a phenotype (physical appearance). In the human race, skin colors come in different shades and tones. Just like people have different eye colors and hair colors, people have different skin colors too. Having different skin colors, just like any other phenotypic differences, does not make any person any less human. It is not a show of the DNA within a person. So, there is nothing wrong with acknowledging that different skin colors exist and that we notice this difference.
In an ideal world, skin color would have the same weight as any other physical differences. However, this is not the reality of the country we live in. This is why it's important to acknowledge skin color (race).
Race in the United States has been used to differentiate people at a systemic level. In the past and present, there have been systems in place that differentiated people and the rights they have based on the color of their skin. We are raised in a country where different races are treated differently. This influences individuals to also treat people differently based on race (consciously or not, we are raised in a racist country, and this reality impacts us all). In the United States, our racist history and the continuation of racist policies affects the way we all individually and systemically view and treat people with different skin colors.
Saying “I don’t see color” is like choosing not to acknowledge this history and different experiences people have/had because of the color of their skin.
This is my personal experience:
Growing up, I was the only mixed child in my family (Japanese and white Jewish American). I knew that I looked different. It is just a fact. It is not a bad thing. But some of my family members on my white side, out of love, would insist they do not see a difference. I think they said this so that I felt equally a part of the family regardless of my skin tone.
This was always frustrating to me. Especially with my white side, I knew that I was the only non-white person in every family photo.
Here's the thing. I knew that I belonged with my family, but I also knew that I am not the same race as my other family members. This should not be a negative thing. Families can be of many different races and are just as much family. So why was it so uncomfortable for them to admit this?
Let's think about that. Maybe it's uncomfortable to admit it because we all know that we live in a world that treats different races differently.
For example, being biracial, to some I looked racially ambiguous. As a child, I was asked “what are you?” all the time because people have the need to put individuals in a race labeled box. I have also been mistaken as the maid or nanny of the family as a teenager when I was at my white family’s house. I knew none of my other family members had to experience these things.
This is why it was frustrating that my family did not acknowledge that I looked different from them. It made me feel like they do not understand that my experience of the family dynamic may be different from them because of how I look (my race). It made me feel unseen for who I am.
Their words were from a good place, but it made me feel worse.
These are just small examples of my personal experience of being a mixed raced person. Most of it was innocent and not extremely harmful, but the “I don’t see color” statement was still very frustrating.
I wish they could have just acknowledged that I looked different. I wish they understood that the way I looked had an impact on what I experienced outside of the family. I wish they made it clear that my race did not diminish my place in the family.
Imagine how this statement may feel when it comes from total strangers.
Imagine how this statement may feel to those who have experienced far worse because of the color of their skin.
We have to acknowledge that different races exist, and the experiences faced by people in different racial groups have been and still are different. The first step to any change is acknowledging what the current state of our world is. Without this, there is no real justice.
Saying “I don't see color” is like saying “I will respect you personally regardless of the color of your skin, but I am not going to acknowledge that the color of your skin impacts your life.” I know, most people who say this do not come from an ill intended place. But this statement is nonetheless harmful.
So, why don't we try to change the dialogue to “I see your color, and I know our experiences may be different because of this, but I honor you, respect you, and support you.”
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